Laboring at home for as long as possible was the plan…and we were off to a great start. Staying busy was key; from doing laundry, to last minute baby preparations, to taking the dogs to the park. I wanted to remain as active as possible for as long as possible. By about 11am my surges were to a point where small tasks around the house were no longer possible. At that point surges were spent rocking with Chris’ (my husband) support and leaning over the couch. Chris was a great support, reading our HypnoBirthing scripts and breathing with me through surges. By 11:30  surges were coming every 4 minutes, lasting about 45 seconds so we thought it was time to take a trip to my OB to see how far I had progressed. My OB’s office as well as the hospital I delivered at is roughly an hour from our house. When we got to the OB I had my very first vaginal check…I was 3cm and 100% effaced. My OB gave us the ok to head to the hospital…I however had other things in mind.

I informed my doctor that I wanted to wait to go to the hospital until my contractions were 3 minutes apart lasting a minute for at least an hour. I told her I would be going to my mother’s house who lives about 15 minutes from the hospital to continue to labor there until the contractions were closer together. She was supportive of my plan as long as Keelyn was tolerating labor well…I had a NST which was passed with flying colors. On to mom’s house!

Chris and I got to my mom’s around 1:30 where I was able to labor there for another 4 hours until Chris was insistent that it was time for the hospital. My contractions were coming every 2 1/2 minutes, they were lasting a minute (sometimes more) and they had been this way for over an hour…Chris practically forced me into the car. I look back now and I was definitely in denial. I really didn’t think I was that far along.

We got to the hospital around 5pm (time starts to become a little hazy here). I was wheeled up to L&D where I was checked again…4cm, given a buff cap and put onto a monitor. Chris gave our birth plan to the nurse (Cynthia) and she was AWESOME. She made a big sign for the door that said HypnoBirthing in Progress Do Not Disturb. After 20 minutes of monitoring I was free to walk around. Cynthia suggested I get into the tub…and she drew up the bath. She also went on the hunt for aromatherapy massage oil (which she found)…came back and showed Chris how to massage my arms and legs during contractions. As great as the bath felt it started to slow my contractions down…so it was time to get out and get walking.

Walking the halls of L&D was the best and the worst thing. Hugely uncomfortable but exactly what my body needed. Contractions were spent leaning against a wall while Chris applied pressure to either side of my hips and we swayed in a figure 8 motion. I quickly entered transition and felt the need to get back to the hospital room because it was getting to hard to focus through the contractions while walking. I was checked again once getting back to the room and was 8cm. I was starting to feel the contractions in my back and what got me through was the pressure Chris applied to my lower back and Cynthia stroking my arms. Another hour passed…maybe? I was checked for the last and final time…10 cm.

I started actively pushing at midnight. I know this because I asked later exactly how long did I push for and was told 54 minutes. I was planning on pushing in any position other than on my back as I was told that pushing on your back is the least effective. Well…pushing on my back felt the most effective for me.  I didn’t want to be coached how to push…I didn’t want counting…but when it came down to it counting gave me focus and made my pushes more effective. 3 counts to 8 for each contraction is what worked for me.

Keelyn was almost born en caul but because she would crown a little and then get sucked back up between contractions I allowed my doctor to break my water. After she broke my water it only took a few good pushes before she was born at 12:54 am. Chris got to help deliver her which was completely amazing…he was the first person to hold her even before the doctor. Keelyn had her cord wrapped around her neck 3 times and never once did she show signs of distress during labor. Her heart rate remained strong the entire time. As Chris held her the doctor quickly unwrapped the cord and then Chris  placed her on my chest. Keelyn was so alert. We locked eyes in an instant and I could feel right away the bond I had with her…and her with me. The most amazing feeling in the world and one that can never be duplicated.

She was born on Wednesday October 27th 2010 at 12:54am, 6 pounds 13 ounces and 19 3/4 inches….Perfection.

My personal belief is that when I look into her eyes I can’t help but know she was sent to me by God. She is all the proof I need that there is someone bigger than us…and I thank him every day for letting me be the lucky woman who gets to call this beautiful girl my daughter.

Aubrie

Finally, when I was almost 38 weeks my midwife referred me to an OB for a version. I had an ultrasound done first where it was discovered that my amniotic fluid levels were quite low. Too low to attempt a version, and low enough to cause concern that something else could be wrong. The OB said that most of his colleagues would recommend I get a c-section that night since my baby was full term and breech.

He realized that was obviously something we wanted to avoid, so he recommended a non-stress test to see how the baby was doing first. Fortunately, my midwife could do this at her office, so we didn’t have to stay in the hospital. Baby was doing great so the orders were to “hydrate like hell” and hope to get my fluids up enough to attempt the version in a couple days. I drank liters and liters of water but when I went back for another ultrasound my fluid levels were barely higher. A version was no longer an option. Time to prepare for plan B.

We did another non-stress test (baby still doing great) and talked things over with our midwife. Here in Utah it is illegal for liscensed midwives to attend breech births at home. This meant our wonderful midwife, Rebecca, could not attend our birth alone. So she contacted a very experienced and well respected lay midwife in our area and asked her if she’d be willing to come to our birth. Chris agreed to come.

We decided it was probably best for Miriam to come pretty soon since my fluid levels were so low. We decided to give her a few more days but made plans to encourage things along the following Wednesday. We continued to do non stress tests every other day, which Miriam always passed with flying colors.

Wednesday (June 23, 2010) came and that morning Rebecca stripped my membranes and gave me cohosh in the hopes of getting labor started. I’m not usually a fan of even these types of intervention but with my low fluid levels and a breech baby we thought it was best to encourage things along. We did another nonstress test that morning too and she was happy as always.When Rebecca stripped my membranes I was 4 cm dilated and 50% effaced with a bulging bag of waters quite low. Not a bad start.

We left Rebecca’s office just before 10 and headed to Costco to get a few last minute things. I started having a few mild cramps. By the time we left Costco they had picked up a bit. We stopped at one more store to get diapers and pads and then headed home. It was just after 11 am when we got home. I was having mild and crampy waves pretty close together but still didn’t know if they would go anywhere. I had several things I wanted to get done around the house and thought I would have plenty of time. I got on the computer to do a quick post on my blog. By the time I was done with that I was having to really concentrate on the waves to relax. They were getting more intense and were VERY close together. Rebecca called around noon and said that was the cohosh at work.

I laid on my bed and listened to Hypnobabies Easy First Stage. The waves were so close together I hardly got a chance to regroup between them. Time gets a little fuzzy from here on out, but I spent a few waves on the toilet and then on the floor of the bathroom on my hands and knees. Then I went back to my bed. Rebecca called again and said she would come right over as soon as her last appointment left. I was back in the bathroom when she got to our house about 1:45. She checked me and I was 7 cm and 80% effaced. And bless her she said I could get in the birth pool!

I was so happy to be in the water. It really helped me relax more. The waves had spaced out a tiny bit so I was getting a bit more of a break between them, but they were also getting super intense. I knelt and leaned against the side of the pool and started vocalizing through them. In the mean time, Jared was working out arrangements for our son Asher who had just woken up from his nap, and we were still waiting on Chris, the other midwife to get there.

Right around when she arrived I started feeling pushy and felt a pop–my water broke. This is also about the time Jared left to take Asher around the corner to a friend’s house. I started pushing involuntarily and pretty soon her bottom was out and then her legs. And Jared wasn’t back yet! Rebecca ran out the door to see if she could catch him but didn’t see him. He got back when Miriam was half way out.

Chris told me to reach down and touch her so I was rubbing her back before her head was out. She got still for a moment while she got her arms out and then I pushed again and her head came right out super easy.  I just lifted her between my legs and turned around. No one else even touched her. I think the whole pushing phase was less than 5 minutes. (Unfortunately, it was so fast that we didn’t get a chance to get out the video camera. I really wanted to get the birth on video since a breech homebirth is so unusual. That is my only regret for the day.)

She was born at 2:41 pm. So I had roughly 3- 3 1/2 hours of active labor. I think because of the cohosh and membrane stripping, everything was more intense. My waves were always super close together. It was definitely a fast ride. But I remained very calm and peaceful during the whole thing. Thank you, Hypnobabies! I really trusted my body and my baby and it could not have gone more smoothly.

When I lifted Miriam out of the water her eyes were wide open and she was quiet. My first thought was that her eyes were huge and she looked so different than Asher did right after he was born. (He was all swollen and bruised.) I rubbed her back and we put a towel on her and she started pinking up and making some noise. We hung out in the water until the cord stopped pulsing and then Rebecca clamped it and Jared cut it. Jared took Miriam and held her skin to skin while I got out of the water and went over to the couch. I wasn’t even bleeding that much thank goodness.

A few minutes later I pushed out the placenta. We just hung out on the couch and Miriam eventually started nursing while Rebecca and Chris cleaned up and then checked me out. I didn’t tear! I just have a little “skid mark” that will heal up fine. I’m not even sore. I only used one ice pack that day and have felt fine since. Much different than how I felt after Asher when it seemed like my bottom wasn’t even attached to by body anymore! Three hours of pushing can do that I guess!

My grandma thoughtfully had some pizza sent to our house so thats what we ate for a late lunch. Then I had to go pee so Rebecca helped me up and I got all cleaned and padded up. I seriously felt SO good. I didn’t feel like I had just had a baby. I put on some clothes and then we weighed and measured Miriam. 6 pounds 10 ounces, 19 1/2 inches long, 13 inch head. Absolutely perfect.

This birth was pretty much exactly as I had been visualizing it my entire pregnancy. The only difference is that it was faster and she was breech. I really wanted to go into labor in the morning after a good night’s sleep and then have her in the afternoon sometime. I imagined being in the water, kneeling and catching her myself. That is exactly what I did. Although labor was very fast and intense, I was always calm and never afraid. I always felt really peaceful about everything. Pushing was SO easy and painless and she came right out fast and perfectly.

I feel like the stars really aligned to give us the perfect peaceful home birth we had prepared for. I will be forever grateful to Rebecca for her confidence in us and the birth process. And also to Chris for agreeing to come so that we could have the birth at home. She was so calming and assuring as I pushed out Miriam. I’m still amazed at how easy and beautiful this birth was when probably 99.9% of people in our situation would have had a c-section. I feel so blessed that I had this experience.

And let me also add that being at home right after is SO great! I’ve loved it. I hope I never have to birth in a hospital again!

Katrina
I am a mama of two, step-mom of three, and photographer living in Utah with my professor husband.
www.redbeanphotography.com
www.atmothersbreast.com
http://redheadmusings.blogspot.com

After a 40 hour labor, 4 hours of pushing, and multiple attempts at vacuum extraction all with no medication, I ended up having a cesarean section. It wasn’t until they cut me open that the doctor realized that the reason she wouldn’t come out was that she was posterior and in brow position, which basically means that she had her neck cranked and was looking out the birth canal. Unfortunately the vacuum they had tried was pulling on her forehead instead of the crown of her head, and she came out with a gigantic purple bruise and a large scab in the middle of her forehead.

I was devastated, and spent the next year and a half mourning the loss of the natural childbirth I so desperately desired. When I got pregnant for the second time, less than a year later, I knew I had a lot of emotional healing to do. I was positive that I wanted to try for a VBAC, but I was actually scared to let myself believe that I could do it. I was terrified of getting my hopes too high and having my natural childbirth “stolen” from me like I felt it was the first time.

For this birth, I was lucky enough to find a team of doctors and midwives that work closely together and are highly supportive of VBAC. I was able to go with the primary care of the midwives, but still meet each of the doctors in case I would need their help. I also used hypnobirthing to help me let go of some of my biggest fears and prepare for a more positive experience.  I didn’t actually attend any hypnobirthing classes, but I found the CD’s and books extremely helpful.

At around 11 PM on March 2nd (I day past my due date), my practice contractions suddenly changed, and although they weren’t extremely intense, I could tell that I was in the early stages of labor. I made sure my husband went to bed right away, and I did the best I could to sleep that night. I was probably able to sleep about 5 hours throughout the night.

In the morning I squeezed in an appointment at the Chiropractor to help ensure that I was lined up and primed for birth. I went directly from the Chiropractor to the Midwives, who told me I was at 5 cm and 80% effaced.  She told me to go home and do lots of walking. I didn’t feel like a lot of walking was really necessary, so instead I took a nap, went on a brief stroll around the block, and made dinner for my family.

After dinner my contractions were 2-3 minutes apart. Both my mom and husband were concerned and thought I should head in to the hospital. I was completely unconcerned about it because I was still able to do the dishes after dinner with brief pauses for each contraction. To appease my mom and husband, I called the midwife to get her opinion. She suggested getting in the bath and said that a warm bath would either speed up or slow down my labor depending on what my body was ready for.

After my bath and listening to some hypnobirthing, my contractions were 5 minutes apart, but much more intense. I still didn’t feel like it was time to go in, so I sat and chatted with my mom in the living room while my husband put our toddler to bed. After, I had him slowly pack up the car and get ready to go. When I finally decided I was ready to go in, we got in the car and I commented to my husband that I felt a little nauseous and shaky. My husband looked a little scared and said he was worried I was in transition already, although I claimed it was just the cereal I ate right before we left and the cold night air.

On the way to the hospital I listened to the hypnobirthing “birthing day affirmations” CD. Apparently, we hit every light green along the way and my husband never had to slow the car down. Interestingly enough, the birthing day affirmations CD ends by saying, “I am ready, I am ready, ready, ready….” It was exactly at that moment that my husband pulled into the parking spot at the hospital and turned off the car. Woah. I was in perfect control and very relaxed for the whole car ride, and for each contraction I had as I walked into the hospital. They checked me when I arrived at 10:15 and I was at 7 cm and 100% effaced.

It wasn’t until they were giving me an IV for GBS antibiotics that I started to feel a little like I was starting to lose control. The nurse that was admitting me was acting like a teenager just woken up from a long nap. I found her so obnoxious that it was hard for me to stay in a deep state of relaxation during contractions. Each one seemed longer and more painful, and I was extremely eager for her to leave the room so that I could regain control.

She finally left me and my husband alone with a birthing ball to do our own thing.  As soon as she left, I explained to my husband how I felt and told him I was worried since I “already” felt like I wanted an epidural. I was sure I had hours/days to go, just like last time. He reassured me, and also said that he didn’t think the nurse was that bad at all. However, when he looked at the monitor, he saw that my contractions really were getting more intense and lasting longer. HA! I had my proof. That nurse really DID make it impossible for me to control my contractions.

I got up to go to the bathroom, and my husband waited just outside the door for me. I wanted to go to the bathroom and then get back into my hypnobirthing groove.  While sitting on the toilet, I suddenly realized that I was about to have a bowel movement. I told my husband this, and he joked that I needed to be careful not to push a baby out too. I pushed a couple of times, which coincidentally happened to be at the same time as a contraction. I noticed that I was shaking uncontrollably as I pushed, but I was relieved and reassured when I actually DID have a bowel movement.

Part of me wondered just a little bit if this was IT. I was feeling the urge to push, but surely it was just because I was going to the bathroom, right? I couldn’t quite find the words to explain to my husband what I was thinking, but I hoped he was able to read my mind. Just to be sure that nothing else had started to come out as I had been pushing, I reached down to check. As my right hand was right below me, there was a sudden, and extremely loud popping sound, and a HUGE gush of water. My socks and my slippers were soaked. I immediately shouted out to my husband “water broke, need to push!” He must have been quick to push the button because it seemed like it was only two seconds later that my midwife was at my knees.

I definitely have a bit of a germ phobia when it comes to certain things, and I was SO embarrassed to have someone at my knees just after having a bowel movement. As she tried to ask me questions about what I was feeling, all I could do was apologize to her because I hadn’t even wiped or flushed yet! Once she realized how important that was to me, she got me some soapy wipes that I could clean up with quickly.

The next contraction happened before I could finish cleaning up all the way, and I told her I needed to push. She calmly told me not to push, or I would end up with a baby in the toilet. After that contraction ended, she and a nurse helped me off the toilet, but I quickly had to brace myself for yet another contraction as soon as I stood up. I put my hand on the frame of the door to support myself. As the nurse and midwife tried to coax me towards the bed in a calm yet frantically urgent way, all I could focus on was finding someone to clean my hand, and also the part of the door frame that I had touched. The thought of clear amniotic fluid on a doorframe that doesn’t get regularly cleaned really bothered me.

And then I felt HOT. Really, really hot. And frustrated. Why didn’t anyone understand how important it was for me to have my hair clip to get the hair out of my face? How come my husband couldn’t find it? The obnoxious nurse told me to forget about the hair clip because I was having a baby. What did she know? I wasn’t going to get on the bed like she demanded, because first I needed my hair clip. My midwife was somehow able to respectfully rip my hospital gown off of me, which immediately cooled me down.

Luckily, she was able to coax me into a good position before the next contraction, because it was really time to push. I knew I was pushing, but I also knew I had a long time to go, so I was still thinking about where my hair clip might be, and why my husband couldn’t find it. My husband was talking about how he could see our baby’s head, but I was still thinking about my hair clip. The next pushing contraction seemed to happen right on top of the first one, and I remember saying, “oh THAT’S the burn that people talk about!” The nurse responded with, “Okay, I’m just going to suck her nose out.” I didn’t really get what she was saying until I heard crying.

THAT’S when I realized what was happening. THAT’s when I realized it was a dream. Or, surely I was just “visualizing” my birth using a hypnobirthing CD. I told my husband that it wasn’t fair, that it seemed too real, that it was a dream, right? With the next push my husband reached down and caught our baby. He handed her to me immediately, and I felt a surge of love come over me. “I love you, I love you, I love you,” I repeated to this beautiful baby girl over and over. Then I looked up and said, “What just happened?”

I walked into the hospital at 10:15. The nurse left us alone around 11:00. I had a baby in my arms at 11:24. But believe me, it felt a lot faster than that!

Looking back on it now, it’s clear that I was in denial during all of the more active parts of labor. My first birth took so painfully long, that it was hard for me to imagine it any other way, even though it was obviously what I wanted.

I see now that when I was in the car and felt nauseous and chilly, it wasn’t just the cereal and the cold night air. I understand that the obnoxious nurse wasn’t making me lose control of my ability to stay on top of my contractions, but rather that they actually were getting longer and harder. And, she probably wasn’t nearly as obnoxious as I thought. The pushing feeling I had on the toilet really was IT, and it was a coincidence that I happened to have a bowel movement at the same time. Not the other way around. And, even though I was anticipating at least 4 hours of pushing that would necessitate me taking care of hair issues, I am SO grateful that that’s not what I ended up with. However, now that I know the power of my push, I’m going to try and slow it down next time so that I don’t tear. Other than that one tear though, it really was a perfect birth.

Jen

I went to see my midwife on Thursday, the day before our due date, and she told me that if I didn’t deliver in the next 10 days she would have to turn me over to a doctor to be induced in the hospital, which was the last thing we wanted.  She suggested there were some natural methods of induction we could try and since I felt my body was ready, I agreed to let her stretch my cervix. This was somewhat painful, but the pain faded within about 30 minutes.  She told me that she could feel the baby’s hair, which made me realize the baby inside me was not the tiny fetus from the ultrasound pictures, but a full term baby.  At the end of the appointment, she asked me if I felt I was ready to have the baby.  I replied casually that I was.

I did give her question a lot of thought after leaving her office.  That afternoon, I walked to a park near our house and sat on a bench in the sun. I had to admit that every night before going to bed, I would secretly hope that my labour wouldn’t begin that night. I wouldn’t say I was fearful, but I was definitely apprehensive, both about the birth and about becoming a mother. That afternoon, I told my baby that I loved her and that I was ready for her to be born.  My contractions began two hours later.

Earlier in the day, I had told my husband that we could go out for Indian food, and even though I was sure my labour had started, we went anyway.  My contractions were 5-7 minutes apart, and were about a 5 out of 10 on the pain scale.  They felt like menstrual cramps, but they were much more bearable because of the long break in between them.  After dinner we went for a walk around the park, and by 11:30, my contractions were 3-4 minutes apart, so we called the midwife. She arrived at midnight, and confirmed that I was 3-4 centimetres dilated.

I spent the night walking up and down the hall, which I found made the pain easiest to bear, and in the shower. I laid down in bed with my husband for awhile, but I found the pain to be too hard to manage laying down, even with my husband’s hands on me. My contractions at this point were 7s and 8s out of 10, which were intense, but bearable.  What really helped me was to take it one contraction at a time, and remember that each contraction would only last for a minute and then it would be over.

We took hypnobirthing classes (I loved Marie Mongan’s book) and I visualized the way my muscles were working.  As much as possible, I tried to relax and welcome the pain, knowing that the more I relaxed, the more effective the contractions would be in bringing forth our baby.  I also had a hot water bottle, which was much more useful than I would have thought.

By 4:00am I was 6-7 cm dilated, which my midwife said was good progress.  My water still hadn’t broken, and she told me that if she broke my water, it would move the labour along more quickly.  Weeks ago, in her office, I had told her that I didn’t want any interventions, but during the labour I quickly agreed.  It was very anti-climactic, the baby’s head was well engaged at this point so very little amniotic fluid came out.  She told me that since the labour was well on its way, I could get into the bathtub (apparently getting into the water too soon can slow things down).

I had 30 contractions in the tub.  My husband went to take a nap (unlike me, he had been working hard up to the birth) and my midwife relaxed on the sofa in the other room, checking on me occasionally, but for the most part, everyone left me alone, which was exactly what I needed. I counted the contractions as a way of distracting myself.

As sun came up, my contractions started to change – I now felt the urge to push – the contractions took over my whole body and reached up and gripped my throat and I started making involuntary guttural noises.  My midwife checked me again, and said I was fully dilated at the back, but I still had some of the edge of my cervix at the front as laying on my back in the tub had put pressure on the back of my cervix, but not the front.  She suggested I lean over the bathroom sink to position the baby’s head right on the front of my cervix.  My husband was up at this point and he rubbed my back as the contractions came, and I was glad then to have him with me.

My midwife started calling the others from her clinic to try to get a second midwife to attend the birth, and she told me to breathe through the contractions as much as possible to avoid pushing.  After about 20 minutes of leaning over the sink, I laid down on the bed on my back and continued to breathe through the contractions.  She told me afterwards that I was able to breathe the baby all the way down to the perineum, which is a hypnobirthing technique, which she said she had not seen anyone do before.

When the other midwives arrived, she asked me to push on the contractions, which I found overwhelmingly painful. I could feel myself tearing at the top, and to be honest, I was afraid to push. With the encouragement of my midwife, I did push my hardest for two contractions.  During one, I reached down and felt the opening, and also felt the baby’s head beneath my skin.  At that moment, I realized how much bigger her head was than my opening.  My midwife watched me do this, and told me that I had the option of an episiotomy, and that it would be her recommendation to do so.  I quickly and gratefully agreed. Our baby was born with the next contraction. Once her head emerged, the rest of her body came out easily.  I wish I could say that she and I bonded in that first hour, but I was still in a lot of pain and I felt overwhelmed by the experience. The midwives helped me breastfeed her, and a few hours later left my husband and I to rest with our new baby.

Some thoughts I’ve had since the birth:

I think it was the stretching of my cervix that caused my labour to begin, but I credit the state of mind that I came to that afternoon with the steady progression of the labour and my ability to focus.

The episiotomy did upset me initially.  I made the mistake of getting out the hand mirror a few days after the birth and between my deep tears and the episiotomy, which cut one of my lips into two pieces, it was really a horror show.  I felt it was a personal failing, that perhaps it had happened because I didn’t have the courage to push hard enough. But time heals all wounds, both physical and psychological, and five months later my tears are light grey lines and the cut is not as pronounced.  Through parenting we discover our tremendous capacity for selflessness, and I realize now how completely inconsequential the episiotomy was.

Although the second stage of labour was very painful, it was actually very, very short – I only pushed for about eight contractions, so I really only experienced about eight minutes of really intense pain.

Looking back, I feel that Lauren’s birth was a really great experience.

Jennifer

Once I started cleaning, signs began to appear!  Bloody show?  Check.  Mucus plug? Check.  Nesting?  The baseboards looked great!

By around 11pm my contractions were about 10 minutes apart and felt like really strong menstrual cramps with a little bleeding.  I called my doula who told me that I was probably in early labor and that I should try to get some sleep because my baby was probably going to be born the next day.

I tried to lay down in bed to rest, but lying down made the contractions more intense and I couldn’t sleep through them, so I sat on the toilet for the first half of the night and later on my birthing ball and rested on against my bed while my husband slept.  I felt the contractions very strongly in my lower abdomen and upper legs.  Laying down was the worst, so I spent the entire night sitting on my birthing ball or the toilet.  I did that while listening to Hypnobabies “Easy First Stage” on repeat until about 5:30am, when I decided it was time to wake my hubby.  At that point my contractions were about 4-5 minutes apart.

Our doula arrived at 7am and at that time my contractions had slowed to about 6-7 minutes apart (my doula told me it is not uncommon for contractions to slow in the morning).  She was there while I labored by my bed.  Taking deep breaths at the beginning of the contractions and then mooing (yes, mooing) as the contraction peaked helped the best.  I vomited a couple of times but it didn’t bother me at all–I had been drinking flavored Vitamin Water, so it didn’t taste all that bad coming up.

At 10:15a my water broke with a monster contraction – it didn’t hurt (it was intense!), but I do think I sounded like some sort of animal in the woods as it passed.  At that point our doula said it was time to head to the hospital, which we did. The drive wasn’t too bad, I think I was in that “resting” period that comes before pushing.  It was a 30 minute drive to the hospital (thanks in part to Chicago traffic) and when we arrived at check-in I had decided that humming in the waiting from was the best way to deal with my post-broken water contractions.

When they checked me I was fully dilated, so they sent me up to L&D (with one of those kits on the gurney for in case I delivered in the elevator.  I began pushing as soon as I got to the room, on my hands and knees.  The doctor wanted me to turn and lay on my back (mostly because I was not positioned well on my hands and knees–I kept straightening my legs), but I still did not want to lay down, so I told him no way and my doula and the nurse helped me get into a better hands-knees position.

I pushed with each contraction that came (2 or 3) and my son was born in 15 minutes.  I was not at all prepared for what pushing would feel like, I don’t know how to describe it – overwhelming?  Otherworldly? It didn’t hurt, no ring of fire, but, wow, to feel a baby come through my pelvis.  Weird.  I felt his head, shoulders, and then his body slid out and I was done!  Incredible.

They placed his 8 pounds, 12 oz body on my belly.  It was pretty cool.  They delayed clamping his cord and I was only separated from him while they stitched my tear (he came out so fast!) but his dad held him skin-to-skin while the doctor tended to me.  My delivery was so fast that the attending physician did not make it to the room in time, and they pulled in a resident who was on his way to another delivery in to my room to catch my baby.

As I only spent 15 minutes in the hospital before delivering, my birth was completely drug free.  I even missed the antibiotics for my GBS, but the doctors weren’t concerned because baby’s delivery was so soon after my water broke.

I have to admit that I was a little nervous about delivering in the hospital, but I was really happy with the doctors and nurses who assisted me, and my doula was indispensable, my husband and I couldn’t have done it without her. (My husband was awesome, too, especially when he told the resident not to give my a cervical check–they had already determined that I was complete downstairs–my husband told him that we wanted to limit the hands in my vagina).  Also, I really liked the Hypnobabies preparation.  At the time I was convinced I wasn’t doing it “right”, but in retrospect I think it worked perfectly.

Laboring at home was key, I felt very comfortable there and suspect that if I had been at the hospital I may have been a little more on edge and progressed a little slower.  My doula said that I could have done the whole thing at home, and next time I just might!

Yay, new baby!

Danielle

On Sunday, March 1, 2009, my husband had an attack of labrynthitis (vertigo). It usually takes him several weeks to recover. Since I was already 40 weeks (or over, depending on the calculator), we knew there wasn’t going to be that much time, but I really hoped it was be at least a few days, otherwise he wasn’t going to be able to help much, if at all.

About 7:20am on March 2, I woke up to go to the washroom & felt like I was kind of damp. I stood up & gushed water all over the floor. Every step I took to the bathroom, I gushed more water. 3 labours, 3 times with my water breaking with no contractions, despite all my attempts to have it start differently. In the bathroom I quickly checked to see if I could feel any cord, since I didn’t think the baby was engaged. No sign of anything, so I figured it was fine. I put a towel between my legs, went out to the living room & called my friend, Jamie, who had offered to come to the birth, to let her know that I’d probably go into labour in the next couple days, since my water had broken. After I talked to her for a bit, I went back to bed & tried to get more sleep.

When I eventually got up, I was still leaking a little bit, but it only seemed to happen when I got up from lying down or bent over. I grabbed the fetoscope & listened for the heartbeat. It was nice & strong. I also started getting contractions around this time. They were fairly mild, I just had to pause briefly when I got one. The baby was quite active during them.They were about half an hour apart. I called Jamie again to let her know I was getting contractions, but still figured labour was a long way off, since I’d had to wait 3 days after my water broke with my second.

I spent the day mostly taking it easy; losing bits of plug all day. The contractions stayed about half an hour apart until around 10, when they started coming every 12-15 minutes. I decided to try to get some sleep. I realized it could be sooner than 3 days until labour really started, but was still hoping that I had at least another day for my husband to recover. By this point I seemed to have stopped losing plug & had a bit of blood.

I didn’t get much rest, the contractions got a lot more painful when I was lying down & started coming closer together. About 1:30am I couldn’t take it anymore. I was thinking that an epidural sounded like a lovely idea. My husband was still up, but I made him go to bed. I was still thinking it would be a long time. Getting up made the contractions hurt less, but they were still pretty painful.

Around 2:30, I couldn’t take it anymore & decided to try having a shower to see if the water helped with the contractions any. I had a waterbirth planned, the pool was all blown up, but it was in the bedroom with the sleeping kids & I really didn’t want to disturb them if I didn’t have to. So, I got in the shower. It was wonderful. Standing up was difficult, though, so I sat on the tub floor & just aimed the shower sprayer at my belly. By this point I had pretty much given up on Hypnobabies. It seemed to have helped a bit with the early contractions, but they didn’t really hurt anyway.

I stayed in the bathroom for nearly an hour. I knew the contractions were getting harder & closer together & I really wanted my waterbirth, but didn’t really want to get out. I kept hoping that hubby would wake up & come in so I could stay there while he got the pool ready, but he never did. So, I reluctantly got out of the tub, dried off & decided to try to move the pool into the living room. I wasn’t sure we’d have enough space, but was hopeful that it would fit. At this point contractions were coming about every 5 minutes, but picking up fast.

I rolled the pool out to the living room, discovered it would fit & went to grab the plastic & sheets to put under it. I woke up dh around 3:30. The thought of trying to dig out the hose & fill the pool was too overwhelming. I laid out sheets (for padding & warmth, my pool didn’t have an inflatable bottom & our floor was concrete) & put plastic over them; between contractions which were coming every 2-3 minutes by now. At some point in here (around 3:40am or so), I also called Jamie & told her the contractions were about 5 minutes apart. She said she was going to have a shower, then see if I wanted her to come up.

I thought about getting in while it was filling, but it seemed like way too much effort. When the pool was finally full (no idea how long it took, in our practice run it was 25 minutes, though) my husband encouraged me to get in. I had to go find a shirt to wear in it, since for some reason I felt really uncomfortable with the idea of being totally naked. The kids were awake by this point, not sure if it was me getting the plastic out of the bedroom, hubby getting the hose out of the closet across from the bedroom, or my moaning through the contractions that woke them, but at least it meant I could turn on the light to find a shirt. I finally found the one I was looking for & got in the pool. I think it was about 4:30am at this point, but I really wasn’t paying attention to the time anymore.

The contractions were really close together & very painful. As expected, doing the pool was about the extent of what dh was capable of doing for me with how awful he was feeling. I figured Jamie was probably on her way & just hadn’t called. Just before 5, she called to say she was on her way. I really had thought she’d be here any minute & was upset she was going to be at least 20 more minutes. H told her he thought I was in transistion. I wasn’t moaning through most of the contractions anymore, just screaming & begging dh to kill me. I was also giving deliberate little pushes on some of the contractions, just because it seemed to make them hurt a little bit less.

Ok, to be totally honest I was pushing quite hard on a couple of them. I just couldn’t handle the pain anymore. I was trying all kinds of different positions to try to get away from how much it hurt. I was really scared of a long pushing phase because I knew I couldn’t take this much pain for that long. I was also scared that I was pushing too soon since I’d only been in active labour for a few hours & I wasn’t feeling any kind of pushing urge, it just felt less painful.

I asked h to check me, since at least then I’d have some idea if pushing hard was likely to cause problems. He checked & said he couldn’t feel anything that seemed like cervix, just something jello-y feeling & possibly the head underneath. He figured the squishy thing was probably the sac. I started pushing with every contraction after he told me he didn’t feel any cervix, but I still wasn’t pushing really hard.

Sometime around here, Jamie arrived. It was about 5:20am Dh was relieved. He was starting to worry he was going to have to decide whether I needed to go to the hospital or not. In fact, just after she called, I’d told him that I was going to make her take me to the hospital as soon as she arrived because I couldn’t take it anymore.

The baby was obviously moving down.  At this point, I wasn’t even really thinking about the baby, I just wanted to get rid of that feeling. It’s horrible! So I started pushing really hard, several times each contraction. I was just concentrating on pushing & so, even though I felt it, it took me awhile to realize that I was feeling a burning sensation & a little bit longer to process what that meant.

I told everyone (the kids were watching from the hall, I think my screaming had scared them a bit, especially the youngest) that I thought I was crowning. Then I reached down to feel if I actually was. The baby’s head was partially out already, with the edges of the membranes floating in the water. What I really wanted to do at this point was to push as hard as I could to get his head out & stop the burning. I also really wanted to avoid tearing.

So, despite how much I wanted the burning to stop, I slowly pushed his head out. Push, pause, burn, push, pause, burn. After about 7 pushes, his head was out. I waited until the next contraction & gave a hard push & his shoulders came out. It almost felt like there was a ‘pop’ as they came out. I think Jamie said his arm was out even before I pushed out his shoulders, but the timing of everything is a bit fuzzy. Unlike with my second, who had just slipped out on the push after his head was out, I had to push again to get N’s body out after his shoulders.

He floated up to the surface of the pool, face down. I grabbed him out of the water & brought him to my chest, then checked to see if he was a boy or a girl. I was kind of surprised to find that he was a boy, but also relieved that labour was over. It was 5:35 am, only 4 hours from when I couldn’t handle the contractions in bed anymore, even though they had still been 10 minutes apart.

I leaned back against the side of the pool and looked down at him. He was a little blue & completely quiet, which freaked me out a bit. Then I saw him move his mouth & knew he was ok. He looked up at me, then promptly closed his eyes & went to sleep. Jamie grabbed a towel & covered him with it.

After waiting for a little, I started getting a few mild contractions and decided to try pushing again to see if the placenta was ready to come out. It took a bit more work then I was expecting & as it came out, Nick woke up & cried for the first time.

Before I’d gotten in the pool, I’d grabbed some containers for things, since I knew dh wouldn’t be able to find anything with as bad as he was feeling. He handed Jamie the bowl for the placenta, which she floated in the pool while I was pushing it out. Once it was out, it was put in the bowl.

The pool was very bloody at this point & I decided I wanted to get out. I gave N to Jamie & leaned on h to get out. Then I sat down on the couch with some towels under me & a big blanket around me & cuddled my new little guy. I tried to nurse him, but he wasn’t at all interested at this point. My older boys came over to see their new brother & h started draining the pool.

Eventually we cut the cord & confirmed something Jamie thought she’d noticed earlier; there was a knot in the cord. When I cut up the placenta to dry it for encapsulation, I took pictures of the knot. After we’d dealt with the cord, I went for a quick shower to get rinsed/warm & get dry clothes on. Jamie went home about 8:30 & h & I crashed for awhile. The kids were wide awake, so I napped on the couch with the baby while they played a game on the playstation. At some point my youngest had a nap on the floor, but my oldest stayed awake for the whole day.

I don’t know exactly how much he weighed at birth, I think he was around 6lb 6oz, maybe a bit less. 19 1/2 inches long & head circumference of 13.4 inches.

Lisa-Marie

On Monday (September 28th) I had some mild contractions during the work day.  They felt like strong braxton hicks so I didn’t think much about it.  Around seven o’clock we started timing them.  They weren’t strong, but we wanted to test my husband’s iPhone contraction timing application.  They were 15-30 min apart at that point.

At 8:30 I decided to do a fear clearing hypnosis session.  The contractions were getting stronger, and I was starting to have flashbacks from my son’s 32 hour labor.  I needed to get my fear under control.  It helped a lot and I calmed down.

At 9:30 I started to wonder if this might really be it.  Contractions were still 15-30 min apart, but some were up to two minutes long and very intense.  I can honestly say my initial thought was “oh crap…I still have so much to do at work before I go on maternity leave!”  So I decided to work for a while (I work from home).  I worked until 11:00 trying to close things out.

I got in the tub at 11:00 thinking it would slow things down so I could go to bed, but things only picked up.  At this point the contractions were about 3-5 min apart and intense enough that I had to really focus to get through them.  I was still in denial that this was the real thing, and then I felt a big gush and knew my water had broken.

Josh started getting our things together.  We were very caught off guard and we hadn’t packed anything.  He called his mom to come watch Ryker, and my mom and our midwife to meet us at the birth center.

We left for the birth center shortly after 1:00 a.m.  The drive was about 15 minutes and we listened to the Hypnobabies Birth Day Affirmations on the way there.

Getting out of the car at the birth center I felt a huge wave of nausea.  I didn’t throw up, but I remember thinking that I must be entering transition.  I was shocked at how calm I was and how quickly I had progressed.

The atmosphere at the birth center was so calming.  The lighting was low, and my midwife spoke in soft tones.  She had the tub filled and waiting, and I immediately got in.  We listened to her heartbeat and my midwife checked her position.  She did not check me for dilation – she said that when it was time to push I would know.  She also tested the fluid on my pad and confirmed my water had broken.  Josh turned on my Hypnobabies script, but I felt like I needed a quiet room so I could concentrate so I had him turn it off.  I did use self-hypnosis and Josh used the queues we had learned which helped me relax.

After about 30 minutes in the tub I started feeling the urge to push.  My midwife said to go ahead and give it a try.  I was lying on my left side and moaning deeply with every contraction.  I could feel her moving down.  Pushing felt so good!

I put my hand down and could feel her head covered in hair.  The contractions were very intense, but I was able to recover and smile and talk in between them.  I never felt out of control.  I never felt like I couldn’t handle it anymore.

My midwife had me put my hand down to help stretch the perineum.  She had me hoot like an owl to slow down on pushing so I wouldn’t tear.  Then suddenly with the next contraction her head was out.  I had a small break before the next contraction, then one more big push and she was out!  She swam up to me and I pulled her up onto my chest.  She was beautiful and perfect.  It was 2:13 a.m. and only forty-five minutes after our arrival at the birth center.

It took her a minute to start breathing, but that was fine since the cord was still attached and pulsating.  We sat and cuddled and massaged her for a minute and then she let out a little shriek.  Once she was breathing well and the cord stopped pulsating my mom cut the cord.  My midwife had me move to the bed to monitor my bleeding while I nursed Ruby and birthed the placenta.  She latched right on and nursed for 45 minutes or so.

Ten minutes later I felt amazing and told everyone I could do it all again right then!  The rush was unlike anything I have ever felt.  I had a very small superficial tear that did not require stitching.

We measured and weighed her (8 lbs, 5 oz and 20 ¾ inches long).  She got her vitamin K shot, and then we tucked her into the co-sleeper.  Josh and I got in bed and went to sleep, my mom wet home, and my midwife went to the next room to sleep.

We woke up to the smell of pancakes being made in the kitchen by my midwife.  It was the best meal I have ever eaten – I was so hungry!  We had breakfast in bed and stared in awe at our little miracle sleeping away next to me.

At 10:00 a.m. Ruby and I had checkups and passed with flying colors, so we left and went home to begin life as a new family.

Leanne

I almost decline an invitation to Todd and Lucy’s barbecue at their Laguna Beach home. Today, I’ve noticed copious amounts of mucus and an increase in Braxton-Hicks. But not wanting to miss a summer evening hanging out with some of our best friends from college, my husband Patrick and I decide I can manage one more night out. We get to their house, and within the hour, Julia and Jared and their kids arrive from Arizona. The kids play well together while the women make beach plans for the next day and the men play Guitar Hero.

As we pack up to leave at 10 p.m., Julia speculates on my condition. “I don’t know if we’ll see you guys tomorrow—you’ll probably go into labor tonight.”

“No way—this baby is in no hurry,” I say. I’d expected that things would get moving around the start of Week 38, like they had with my now three-year-old son. But when that didn’t happen, I mentally committed to the full 40 weeks and settled in, trying to stay patient.

We roll the windows down on the drive home, letting in the cool ocean air from the Pacific. Our son falls asleep quickly and peacefully in his car seat. Upon arriving home, my husband turns on the TV, and I finish off some delicious tortellini pasta salad my friend Christine had dropped off earlier. Then I head up for bed and fall asleep quickly.

Suddenly it’s 1 a.m., and I am startled awake by a feeling down low, almost a stinging feeling. It is different. It is strong. I know right away that this is it. I take a trip to the bathroom and return to bed, but the feeling is not subsiding.

A moment of fear, of apprehension, seizes me, a moment that I don’t remember experiencing last time. Perhaps it’s because this time, I know what I’m in for. The first time around, I didn’t know what to expect; I had no reference point. But as a second-timer, I know the intensity and the hard work and the focus that’s required.

Also, this time, I’m not going to the hospital. The recent ban on midwives in local hospitals forced my birth paradigm to shift and expand and now, I was about to join one of the most misunderstood and even reviled collection of women out there: the home birthers. My big pregnant body was the starship Enterprise, boldly going where no woman had gone before—well, no one that I knew, anyway. Could I really do this?

I quickly accept that it’s time to board the train now, and that I can’t get off until the ride is over.

“I feel funny,” I tell my sleeping husband, and grab my pillow and blanket and waddle into the guest room. I’m lying in bed there for a couple of minutes when I realize that I’m wide awake and absolutely cannot sleep anymore. So I go downstairs to sweep the floor and do the dishes so we will have a clean house when my birth team arrives. Every five minutes, I lean over the kitchen counter for 45 seconds during a wave, taking deep breaths and focusing on staying loose, and then when it’s over, I resume cleaning. The waves are like clockwork, and by 2 a.m., I wake up Patrick.

“Time to fill up the pool,” I say.

He lifts his head groggily. “Uhhh… Are you sure?”

I’m sure. The tightening of my insides is consistent, regular. So I call my certified nurse-midwife’s pager. Fifteen minutes later, no response. Thirty minutes later, no response. Mildly panicked, I get online, search the name and number of my student doula, and call her immediately. She is surprised to hear that my midwife hasn’t responded to the page and gives me her direct number.

I quickly place a call to my midwife, and thankfully, she picks up. She advises taking a hot bath to determine whether this is the real thing. If the waves speed up, she says, I’m surely in labor. If things slow down, then we all might have a ways to go. I head to the guest room and get into the almost-full AquaDoula. But the high, thin sides of the pool combined with the deep water make it impossible for me to relax and release my body during waves. I get in my bathtub instead.

While there, Patrick is timing my waves on contractionmaster.com. By 3:30 a.m., the waves are coming every three minutes and lasting for about a minute. I can’t ignore the sensation of my body opening up. Discomfort is present but distant as I use my hypnosis tools. I am peaceful, calmly turning off my light switch during waves, confident that I’m doing everything right. The breath I slowly exhale through my nose is bright orange anesthesia that courses through me from top to bottom, deadening the nerves throughout my body. I pay attention to my jaw and facial muscles, making sure they remain slack, dead. I find myself thinking about the physiological reality of what is happening, picturing my abdominal muscles tightening and squeezing while the rest of me remains loose and limp and stretchy. And mentally, I remind myself how good this process is for my baby.

As part of my Hypnobabies study, I had often visualized a Special Place, but to my surprise, I don’t choose to visit it during the waves. Instead, a brand-new image keeps coming into my mind. During waves, I close my eyes and see myself on a ship. The ship is in a storm, bucking wildly. My job is to hold on and outlast the wild wave I’m riding and not get tossed into the ocean. My job is to hold my ground, to face it all bravely, and to do it while I keep my face and jaw relaxed.

In my mind, I also find myself unexpectedly chanting the chorus of “Ong Namo,” a song by Sikh musician Snatam Kaur that I had come to love after hearing it in yoga class. Saying the words to myself gives me something wonderfully repetitive to focus on while I ride out the storm.

The student doulas arrive at 4 a.m. My husband goes downstairs to let them in and I get out of the bathtub, wrapping myself in a big fluffy towel and retreating to the bed in the guest room. For a half hour, I cycle between sitting on the bed chatting with them and lying down on the bed during waves. After a while, I decide to sit on my birth ball and lean over onto the bed, hoping that this would provide as much comfort as it had during my last labor. One of the doulas massages my lower back with warm oil during waves. It feels great, but the bed I’m leaning onto is too low. My belly can’t hang forward the way it needs to. The pain starts fighting with me, so I give up on the ball and climb back into bed.

Things are changing. I grow serious and can no longer talk or joke around between waves. I just want to close my eyes and focus everything I have on my breath and this image of a triangle with one of the points at the top. It’s the way I’m envisioning my body opening up and releasing my baby.

It’s 4:45 a.m. My midwife arrives. She asks how I am, and I tell her I’m really cold and shivery, a sensation that I remember accompanying transformation (transition) during my last labor. She checks my dilation and finds that I’m at 8 centimeters with a bulging bag of water, which confirms my suspicions about my progress. I decline her offer to break my water and decide to get back on the ball to encourage my baby to keep heading down. As I’m sitting there, I start feeling “pushy” during the midpoint of each 90-second wave. It’s involuntary. I go with it and let myself bear down as my body dictates.

By 5 a.m., the haze begins. I can barely communicate anymore. I am unaware of the comings and goings of the two doulas, my midwife, the home birth assistant and my husband. But I am not afraid. On the contrary, I feel strong. The end of this physical challenge is in sight. I feel safe and know that my only job right now is to surrender to this force that is so much larger than myself.

I manage to ask someone to turn on my Snatam Kaur CD. The song “Ong Namo” plays. A spirit of peace hangs heavy in the dim room. Somehow I get into the birthing pool and on my knees, I lean over the side of the pool that’s been padded with pillows and towels and rest my head on my forearms. The water is warm and soothing. One of the doulas is holding my hand. Her constant presence helps me focus. She is my rock. She tells me what a great job I’m doing. The only thing I fear at this point is that she will leave. I quietly beg her to stay. She does.

As a wave comes roaring in, I suddenly remember an awesome water birth I’d watched dozens of times on YouTube (“Anya’s Water Birth”). In it, the hypno-mother emits a low, quiet, steady guttural hum during waves. There’s no screaming, no swearing, no writhing around, just humming. So I try it. It proves extremely effective for me. It gives me something to do, a way to push back against the force without tensing up my body.

It’s 5:30 a.m. During a wave, I am breathing my baby down, pushing gently and holding my breath occasionally, and I feel a pop. My bulging bag of water has finally broken. My midwife advises that things could really start ramping up now. I remain calm and just keep doing what I am doing. During the waves that follow, my midwife reaches into the water and touches me somewhere down there, saying, “Push right here.” It helps me focus. The room is silent except for “Ong Namo” quietly playing on repeat and the soft rustling of clothing and shuffling of birth supplies. My midwife asks if I want to turn over and sit down in the pool. I try between waves, but it just doesn’t feel right. So I stay on my knees.

By 5:50 a.m., I feel like it’s time. I turn around and sit down. It is so wonderful to be alone in the pool, alone with my body and my breath and my baby. The wave comes, and I start my hum. And then midway through the wave, I have to hold my breath for just a few seconds and push like crazy. My body wants me to. And then I feel…full. My baby is coming. I reach down and feel a soft, slimy head sliding into my hands. It is otherworldly. I feel so stretched, like I might rip from front to back, and a moment of panic hits me.

“I don’t want to tear,” I whisper.

“Just go slowly,” says my midwife.

I do. I breathe deeply and relax into the discomfort. And then I feel my baby’s head slip back inside a little, literally feeling it slide back under my pubic bone. Darn, I think. I notice that that reggae version of “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” is playing. I wonder what happened to “Ong Namo.”

A few minutes pass, and then it’s time to push again. I go for it and push like hell. My baby’s head pops out. My midwife is right there, checking for the cord. It’s wrapped around the baby’s neck once. I try to push the body out with the next wave, but I’m not making much progress. A minute passes.

“Let’s have you stand up,” my midwife says gently, and she helps me to my feet. Trepidation washes over me. Is something wrong? But my trust in my qualified care providers, these wise women, smothers my disquieting thoughts. I smile with my eyes closed as I stand unsteadily, feeling my baby’s heavy head dangling between my legs.

I squat a bit and push and push and start feeling off-balance. No baby. I’m scared.

“HELP!” I yell. One of the doulas rushes to my left side as I push again. And then my baby, my sweet baby girl, slides out of my body in a gush of fluid and the home birth assistant catches her and shuttles her up between my legs so I can grab her.

“I did it! I did it!” I clutch her to my chest, yelping over and over again. The room is swirling around me as I scream with joy, flooded with euphoria. I have never felt so high.

Dim morning light trickles through the shutters. The warmest smiles I have ever seen surround me as I am helped back into a seated position in the pool. I look at my baby for the first time and start to sob, taken by how beautiful she is. Patrick comes behind me and is equally smitten. Then I notice my son gingerly creeping into the room, peering curiously at his sister.

After about 15 minutes, my midwife reminds me of one final task: pushing out the placenta. Grudgingly, I get out of the pool, lie on my back on the bed and easily push it out. A quick exam tells my midwife that I have not torn, even though my little girl weighs nine pounds, one ounce and is 22 inches long.

Cat Stevens’s “Morning Has Broken” is playing. I nurse my daughter for the first time with my son snuggled next to me. The palpable after-birth high keeps rolling over and through me for days.

I am moved by Susan McCutcheon’s observation that “like water taking the shape of its container, experiences often take the shape of expectations.” I expected to have a joyful, spiritual, and life-changing birth experience, and with the help of Hypnobabies and caregivers who shared my vision, that is exactly what happened.

Kelley

I woke up at 6:30am and had mild contractions. Thought-eh, here we go again-this had been going on for days. Immediately I sat on my exercise/birth ball and made large circles with my hips and when the contractions got painful I bounced up and down-hard (let’s shake that baby down!) I yelled and cried and let it out but got through them. I remembered my Hypnobabies scripts and “imagined my baby sliding quickly and easily down the birth canal.”

At 9:30am I figured I better get a shower in case this was it. After my shower I woke up my husband (he was mad I had let him sleep for three hrs, but hey he’s a grump in the morning. I still have no clue how he slept through all my yelling!) He began timing them and got excited. I remained reserved (yes I’m pessimistic) that it just would fizzle. He timed them for 20 minutes each hour-they just got closer. He got really excited and was running all over frazzled, packing last minute items. I had to remind him to feed our pets about four times.

I knew I wanted to stay home as long as possible, but really, how do you know how long to wait? Well I waited till they averaged. 1 1/2 to 2 min. apart and we drove 10min. to the hospital. I think we left the house at about noon. The car ride just intensified the contractions. I was still in denial-thinking that this can’t be it, I can’t really be having a baby today. My husband got a security person to bring a wheelchair to the car and bring me inside while he parked and brought in our bags. I waited forever in the emergency check in. Apparently I must not have looked like I was in active labor. A nurse finally asked when I was due, and I could barley yell “Overdue!” (I was 40w and 4days.)

I was promptly whisked to L&D triage where a resident doc checked me and said I was 6cm, and 100%. Woohoo! They quickly moved me to a labor room, by then my sis had arrived and helped my husband lug all our gear to the new room.

Contractions were getting very intense. I sat on my ball while DH sat on the edge of the bed and held me up while the nurses filled out paperwork and asked annoying questions. I don’t think the air worked in the room and by this time my whole body was DRENCHED in sweat. They had a hard time finding her heart rate and kept wanting me to lie down in the bed, and finally said I HAD to. By then I was SCREAMING my head off-they hurt so bad. Everything became very fuzzy and I began to blank out.

I said-“OK you win-give me drugs now in an IV!” (I said no IV in my birth plan-I am deathly afraid of needles!) They kept saying –“Ok it’ll be a few minutes.” I thought I seriously would DIE from that pain. How could anyone live through this? Then I screamed-“Bring me an epidural NOW! Hurry!” The woman said “Ok but we have to get you completely checked in before they can authorize it-it will be about 20 more minutes.” Lady-I’m going to pass out here-Now, now, now! I was in SO much pain. Finally someone had the sense to check me again-and low and behold I was complete and ready to push.

***Afterthought:  That was transition, but I didn’t recognize it.  When you think you’ll die, that is transition.  It was very hard to focus with them demanding I answer stupid questions I already answered in triage and from “Pre-registering” (what a joke!)

After they checked me I felt a big gush and I knew my water had broke. By this time they had the IV line in but nothing was ever put in it. She says, ”Its too late now-you can’t have anything.” I kinda panic, but hey she said I’m ready to push and before they were even set up, with each contraction, I was gently grunting that baby down.

The last time I looked at the clock it was 1311, and she was born at 1333, so I think I pushed for 22 minutes. My doc didn’t make it in time-they had so many people in the room the on call doc at the hospital was rushed in. At the last sec, Mr. Meanie doc from my practice “caught” the baby (thankfully he was totally polite and nice that day for once).

Pushing was…the easy part. There was no “ring of fire”. I kept thinking-are you sure she’s right there? cause I don’t feel like it. I felt her head with my finger-still thinking there’s no way this baby is gonna fit! Once I really pushed I knew I peed all over-it just came out. I heard them say they wanted to cath me (I did not want) and they kept saying “Oh it won’t hurt, it won’t hurt”-yeah right! I kept screaming at the lady-“Its hurting you lied! Stop stop!” My sister said they just gave up cause the contractions were coming so fast. I pushed so hard I thought “I hope this is it cause I just don’t have anymore in me.” Once her head was out, the rest just slid out.

Mr. Meanie doc even remembered DH wanted to cut the cord, and without skipping a beat, he handed the scissors over to DH. She was put on my belly for a few minutes, but had a lot of fluid in her lungs so she was taken straight across from me to the warmer for evaluation. Sis went with baby and DH stayed holding my leg. It was only a matter of a few minutes and they said the placenta was coming, and to give a little push. Easy peasy (that part).

I ended up with a second degree midline tear (not bad I suppose…) The doc proceeded to sew me up-said the numbing medicine would help. OK-I don’t know if that syringe had saline in it or what-but I felt every stitch with that “hook”. I kept saying “owe, owe, owe” I swear he took forever. Then I started shaking uncontrollably, which they said was from the hormones and was normal.

Finally a nurse cleaned me up and baby was brought over to me. A neonatologist was brought in first to deep suction her, since she didn’t spend enough time being squeezed in the birth canal. Then they had to get her temp up a bit. I attempted to breast feed, that was very heartbreaking-she just wouldn’t suck. I cried. We held her and stayed in that room for an hour before we were moved to a postpartum room. It took two more tries at BFing, but she finally latched on in the side lying position.

We were discharged about 30 hrs after she was born. It would have been sooner, but the pediatrician apparently forgot about us. I was very pleased with the way everything went. I doubted myself the whole time, mainly because I knew everyone else doubted me too. But I did it, we did it. Just how I wanted. We are now a family of three, and I am in total awe of this wonderful miracle God has given us.

Christina
First-time mom.  Survived infertility and got our miracle!
http://willieverbeamommy.blogspot.com

I had been having prodromal labor (labor that starts and stops, often referred to as “false labor” however there is nothing false about it) for about 2 weeks.  On Thursday August 6, I started having contractions at 10pm.  They were nothing terrible and pretty easy to breathe through but strong enough that I wasn’t able to sleep.  I was up all night with these contractions that were not getting stronger or closer together.  I was ready to chalk it up to prodromal labor.

When Josh and Jack woke up in the morning, I was still awake from the night before.  I was pretty tired but unable to sleep through these contractions.  Josh suggested we take a walk and see if they picked up.  We walked and they started to slow down.  I was pretty discouraged at this point but thought if it is meant to happen, it will.

We got home and contractions spaced to every 10 minutes instead of every 5 minutes, however they were stronger.  All of this just didn’t make sense to me.  I went on the spinningbabies website to see if there were any techniques I could use to try to get labor to pick up again.  I tried the belly lift.  I did it for 10 contractions in a row just like the site said and wouldn’t you know it, my contractions picked up.  Now back to every 5 to 6 minutes lasting 60-90 seconds.

They were getting stronger and more intense and I decided it was time to listen to my hypnobabies birthing day script.  This helped me TREMENDOUSLY!  I was able to breathe through and allowed my body to just go completely limp.  (Josh actually thought the contractions had stopped at one point because he couldn’t tell if I was having them.)  Contractions were getting stronger but still not closer together.  At about 3pm, Josh suggested we head for the hospital.  I was pretty sure they would just send us home because I wouldn’t be progressed enough but I agreed we could just go and see.

We arrived at the hospital around 3:30 and when I told the nurse I was there to have a baby she gave me a funny look.  (I didn’t look like I was in huge amounts of pain).  I think she thought I was scheduled for an induction.  It was pretty comical when she admitted me and checked me for dilation only to find I was dilated to 7!!!  I thought, “wow, this has been sooo much easier than my first labor”.

I really wanted to get up and move but the nurse insisted I be on the monitor for at least 15 minutes.  I consented and put in my hypnobabies.  (I don’t give it enough credit; the hypnobabies did so much for me with this labor!)  After she took off the monitor I got in the tub and was not comfortable in there.  I sat on the birthing ball while Josh rubbed my back.  My best friend, Ashley, showed up at about 4:15.  When I was tired of the ball, I laid in bed and Ashley rubbed my belly during a contraction which helped a lot.  Just then (around 5:30, I think) my water broke and I instantly felt pressure.  We got the nurse who checked me and said I was about 9cm and that she would call my doctor who lived 10 minutes away.

From this point on, everything went really fast.  With every contraction I felt the urge to push and most of the time I couldn’t stop my body from doing it.  I was laying on my side in the hospital bed hanging on to the side bar for dear life.  Ashley was rubbing my belly and Josh was rubbing my back.  Doc got there and asked if he had time to get his scrubs on before he checked me.  The nurse told him he didn’t have time to even check me, baby was coming!  He quick threw on his scrubs and my body was pushing.  It hurt so bad!  I did a lot of screaming, a lot of yelling at my support team telling them they didn’t understand the pain I was in.  I believe at one point, I said I was done and I just wanted to go home.  (I don’t remember that feeling with my first.)

I was laying there, legs together and finally someone just pulled my one leg open and I turned onto my back all while pushing.  I kept telling them that he was coming out of my butt because that is honestly what if felt like.  Doc told me to reach down and feel his head and I did.  What an amazing feeling!  After a few pushes his head came out and I waited for another contraction to get the rest of him out. He was born at 6pm on the dot and perfect in every way!  They immediately put him on me and we have been together ever since!

They did not whisk him away to a warmer, they did not cut his cord until it stopped pulsating.  My birth went as perfectly as I could have planned!  The doctor did the minimal assessments with Elliot on my chest and said he’d be back in the morning to check on us and finish assessing him.  Doc told me that we could have done this one without them (him and the nurse).  That felt good to hear.

Pretty soon it was just me, E, and Josh in the room.  He happily nursed for about 25 minutes on one side.  After that, we got up and walked to our new room where we would stay for the night.

Elliot was born on August 7 and weighed 8lbs 3oz.  He was 19 ½ inches long and has a full head of hair!

Bethany